22 June 2012

school and a break

I have been very overwhelmed this semester with readings, essays, and exam preparations. Sometimes I feel like maybe I am too old, or maybe I have too big of a family, or maybe I am just a little bit crazy. Most likely it is a little bit of all of the above. When I throw in a major move every semester or so I really start to think I have gone a little loopy.

I have eight days left in my semester...four and a half assignments to finish and two exams to write. (I am exhausted just writing that by the way). There are moments when I feel like I may have an anxiety attack and there have been a few tears when I think about how I am not being the mother/wife that I would like to be this month. I have had my doubts and have questioned why I am torturing myself? I do not have to do this. It is costing me money that I do not have. And to be honest I don't even know what I am going to do with this degree when I am done.

BUT...I have seven classes to finish after this month. I have always wanted to further my education and didn't have the opportunity to finish when I was younger. I want to learn and I know that without the deadlines I would find too many other things that need to get done and would put it off. (Note to self: notice the procrastination theme...).

For the next eight days I need to focus on my classes...I need to finish this for me. I don't want to give up. I want to continue to move forward...to where...I am not quite sure yet. And then I want to take a few days with my family to just enjoy their company and nothing else...

so I will be back in about two weeks...

see you then!

1 comment:

  1. Joanna! I love reading your blog! I almost get homesick for BC all that fruit and scenery everything! Love catching up on whats going on in life! Your kids are getting so big and you are an amazing mother! I love your cereal and toast post because some mornings that just real life! hurry hurry hurry is usually how those mornings go eh! Lucky if they get breakfast running out the door! Love your comment and hearing from you hope you guys are doing good and that school is going good too! ttys