Procrastination and a Plan

I am still alive over here.

I have been taking one class this summer and have been busy finishing off my final four essays before my two month break from school.

I am taking the history of global labour and aside from learning a few things I didn't know about the slave trade, it has been...well, I'll just say that it isn't my favourite class. Taking a class that I am not really enjoying during the summer while my kids are home has been a little challenging and has given me opportunity to work on perfecting my procrastination talent. I look at it as part of my education towards becoming a writer. I am now really good at working under pressure with a deadline looming in front of me. Not only that, but I have also completed a few lingering projects that needed doing...procrastination does have some benefits. On the downside I have two more essays to write by Friday night.

One of the great paradoxes of my life ~ I love to write, but I will do almost anything to get out of doing it. I still haven't figured that one out.

I am also finalizing some of my future plans. My hubby promised me a nice long talk once his show was in place in the gallery... and I did not forget the promise. We always intended our stay in the Okanagan to be temporary. There were a few moments when we thought we might stay. Some days being close to family and friends is really tempting. But, deep down we know that is not our path.

Nothing is really finalized yet, but we have had some great discussions about what we want out of life and where we want to be in 5, 10, 20 years. We spent a few minutes despairing not knowing how to get there and wishing we were independently wealthy so we could be where we want to be NOW. The desire was strong enough that I actually bought a lottery ticket. Spending a few days dreaming about the what if? was a fun experiment. But, when the "you are not a winner" started flashing across the screen I quickly came back to reality.

We are formulating plans that we are both really excited about. They are not perfect but they will take us towards the life we want. As I often remind my kids ~ If you want a clean room, you have to clean it. (unless you have enough money or Tom Sawyer smarts to get somebody to do it for you). I think we have found something that will give us some of what we want now and will help take us towards getting everything we want. Things are looking pretty good. I just have to finish off these essays, do a little more research and hopefully by the end of the year our plans will be finalized!

I'll keep you posted.

End of Semester Blues...

This morning I remembered that it has been awhile since I have made a post and writing one seems like the perfect way to procrastinate writing the essay I should have finished weeks ago.

I am very quickly reaching the end of another semester and this time as I look at the books and think about the essays and exams that are left to write I am having an extremely hard time. There is almost no part of me that wants to do it. I feel done. I am so tired. I have been working on my degree for six years and will have six classes left once I finish the ones I am currently working on. I am so close...but I really feel done. I miss my family. I miss having time for my kids and husband and kitchen...there are a million projects on my to do list. I really want to just relax and enjoy the nice weather before it gets too hot. (I am really hoping for another mild summer...I have discovered that the house we are living in holds heat really well. I am getting nervous...soon the thermometer will pass the 30 degree C mark and head for the 40...I am not ready for that yet). *sigh*

But ~ I know I only have six classes left...so close to finishing my degree...next year at this time I will be done and I will have completed a goal that I have had for a really long time. I am learning something new on a daily basis which I really do love and I am setting a good example for my kids which I think is really important. I will be finished this semester in a mere seventeen days and then it will be summer break which I am thoroughly looking forward to. At the end of the month my husband will also be finished his group of paintings that he has been working on every almost every night (when he hasn't been working) for the past few months (he has a big solo show late summer/fall). July will most likely be hot...but...my family will be together and we won't be rushing to meet deadlines.

I know all these things...but I still want to procrastinate.

oh how I wish this was me!